Books I Love
Items in this hypelist
Finished
It''s Kind of a Funny Story
Ned Vizzini · 2007
<br>Like many ambitious New York City teenagers, Craig Gilner sees entry into Manhattan’s Executive Pre-Professional High School as the ticket to his future. Determined to succeed at life—which means getting into the right high school to get into the right college to get the right job—Craig studies night and day to ace the entrance exam, and does. That’s when things start to get crazy.<br><br>At his new school, Craig realizes that he isn't brilliant compared to the other kids; he’s just average, and maybe not even that. He soon sees his once-perfect future crumbling away. The stress becomes unbearable and Craig stops eating and sleeping—until, one night, he nearly kills himself. <br><br>Craig’s suicidal episode gets him checked into a mental hospital, where his new neighbors include a transsexual sex addict, a girl who has scarred her own face with scissors, and the self-elected President Armelio. There, isolated from the crushing pressures of school and friends, Craig is finally able to confront the sources of his anxiety.<br><br>Ned Vizzini, who himself spent time in a psychiatric hospital, has created a remarkably moving tale about the sometimes unexpected road to happiness. For a novel about depression, it’s definitely a funny story.<br>
The Winter Goddess
Megan Barnard • 2025
The Lost Queen (Lost Queen Series, 1)
Signe Pike • 2018
The Forgotten Kingdom A Novel
Signe Pike • 2020
Save Me the Waltz
Zelda Fitzgerald • 2019
Madame Bovary
Gustave Flaubert • 2002
Alias Grace
Margaret Atwood • 1996
We Have Always Lived in the Castle (Penguin Classics Deluxe Edition)
Shirley Jackson • 2006
Daughters of Victory A Novel
Gabriella Saab • 2023
Prodigal Summer A Novel
Barbara Kingsolver • 2009
Demon Copperhead A Novel
Barbara Kingsolver • 2022
The Lacuna A Novel
Barbara Kingsolver • 2010
The Four Winds A Novel
Kristin Hannah • 2021
Honoring Your Ancestors: A Guide to Ancestral Veneration
Mallorie Vaudoise • 2021
The Shadowed Land A Novel
Signe Pike • 2024
At the Edge of the Orchard A Novel
Tracy Chevalier • 2016
The Glassmaker
Tracy Chevalier • 2024
Shady Hollow
Juneau Black • 2022
I Who Have Never Known Men
Jacqueline Harpman • 2019
<p><b>SISTERHOOD. SECRETS. SURVIVAL.</b><br> <br> <b>Discover the haunting, heart-breaking post-apocalyptic TikTok sensation.</b><br> <br> Deep underground, thirty-nine women are kept in isolation in a cage. Above ground, a world awaits. Has it been abandoned? Devastated by a virus?<br> <br> Watched over by guards, the women have no memory of how they got there, no notion of time, and only vague recollection of their lives before. But, as the burn of electric light merges day into night and numberless years pass, a young girl - the fortieth prisoner - sits alone an outcast in the corner.<br> <br> Soon she will show herself to be the key to the others' escape and survival in the strange world that awaits them above ground. The woman who will never know men.<br> <br> <b>WITH A NEW INTRODUCTION BY SOPHIE MACKINTOSH, BOOKER PRIZE-LONGLISTED AUTHOR OF THE <i>WATER CURE</i><br> <br> **<i>Orlanda</i>, the next sensation from Jacquline Harpman, is available now**</b></p>
The Antidote A Novel
Karen Russell • 2025
We Have Always Lived in the Castle (Penguin Classics Deluxe Edition)
Shirley Jackson • 2006
<b>Shirley Jackson's beloved gothic tale of a peculiar girl named Merricat and her family's dark secret</b><br><br>Taking readers deep into a labyrinth of dark neurosis, <i>We Have Always Lived in the Castle</i> is a deliciously unsettling novel about a perverse, isolated, and possibly murderous family and the struggle that ensues when a cousin arrives at their estate. This edition features a new introduction by Jonathan Lethem.<br><br>For more than seventy years, Penguin has been the leading publisher of classic literature in the English-speaking world. With more than 1,700 titles, Penguin Classics represents a global bookshelf of the best works throughout history and across genres and disciplines. Readers trust the series to provide authoritative texts enhanced by introductions and notes by distinguished scholars and contemporary authors, as well as up-to-date translations by award-winning translators.
The Haunting of Hill House (Penguin Classics)
Shirley Jackson · 2006
The greatest haunted house story ever written—the inspiration for the hit Netflix horror series!<br/><br/>One of The Atlantic’s Great American Novels of the Past 100 Years<br/><br/>First published in 1959, Shirley Jackson's The Haunting of Hill House has been hailed as a perfect work of unnerving terror. It is the story of four seekers who arrive at a notoriously unfriendly pile called Hill House: Dr. Montague, an occult scholar looking for solid evidence of a “haunting”; Theodora, his lighthearted assistant; Eleanor, a friendless, fragile young woman well acquainted with poltergeists; and Luke, the future heir of Hill House. At first, their stay seems destined to be merely a spooky encounter with inexplicable phenomena. But Hill House is gathering its powers—and soon it will choose one of them to make its own.<br/><br/>For more than seventy years, Penguin has been the leading publisher of classic literature in the English-speaking world. With more than 1,700 titles, Penguin Classics represents a global bookshelf of the best works throughout history and across genres and disciplines. Readers trust the series to provide authoritative texts enhanced by introductions and notes by distinguished scholars and contemporary authors, as well as up-to-date translations by award-winning translators.
The Scarlet Letter
Nathaniel Hawthorne · 2020
“We dream in our waking moments, and walk in our sleep.” ― Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Scarlet Letter<br/>The Scarlet Letter: A Romance is a work of historical fiction by American author Nathaniel Hawthorne, published in 1850. Set in Puritan Massachusetts Bay Colony during the years 1642 to 1649, the novel tells the story of Hester Prynne, who conceives a daughter through an affair and then struggles to create a new life of repentance and dignity. Containing a number of religious and historic allusions, the book explores themes of legalism, sin, and guilt.<br/>Its great burden is the weight of unacknowledged sin as seen in the remorse and cowardice and suffering of the Rev. Arthur Dimmesdale. Contrasted with his concealed agony is the constant confession, conveyed by the letter, which is forced upon Hester, and has a double effect, — a healthful one, working beneficently, and making her helpful and benevolent, tolerant and thoughtful ; and an unhealthful one, which by the great emphasis placed on her transgression, the keeping her forever under its ban and isolating her from her fellows, prepares her to break away from the long repression and lapse again into sin when she plans her flight. Roger Chillingworth is an embodiment of subtle and refined revenge.<br/>The book though corresponding in its tone and burden to some of the shorter stories, had a more startling and dramatic character, and a strangeness, which at once took hold of a larger public than any of those had attracted. Though imperfectly comprehended, and even misunderstood in some quarters, it was seen to have a new and unique quality; and Hawthorne's reputation became national.<br/>A True Classic that Belongs on Every Bookshelf!
The Goldfinch
Donna Tartt • 2014
The Goldfinch
Lady Tan's Circle of Women
Lisa See • 2023
*NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER!* From “one of those special writers capable of delivering both poetry and plot” (The New York Times Book Review) an immersive historical novel inspired by the true story of a woman physician in 15th-century China—perfect for fans of Lisa See’s classics Snow Flower and the Secret Fan and The Tea Girl of Hummingbird Lane. According to Confucius, “an educated woman is a worthless woman,” but Tan Yunxian—born into an elite family, yet haunted by death, separations, and loneliness—is being raised by her grandparents to be of use. Her grandmother is one of only a handful of female doctors in China, and she teaches Yunxian the pillars of Chinese medicine, the Four Examinations—looking, listening, touching, and asking—something a man can never do with a female patient. From a young age, Yunxian learns about women’s illnesses, many of which relate to childbearing, alongside a young midwife-in-training, Meiling. The two girls find fast friendship and a mutual purpose—despite the prohibition that a doctor should never touch blood while a midwife comes in frequent contact with it—and they vow to be forever friends, sharing in each other’s joys and struggles. No mud, no lotus, they tell themselves: from adversity beauty can bloom. But when Yunxian is sent into an arranged marriage, her mother-in-law forbids her from seeing Meiling and from helping the women and girls in the household. Yunxian is to act like a proper wife—embroider bound-foot slippers, recite poetry, give birth to sons, and stay forever within the walls of the family compound, the Garden of Fragrant Delights. How might a woman like Yunxian break free of these traditions and lead a life of such importance that many of her remedies are still used five centuries later? How might the power of friendship support or complicate these efforts? A captivating story of women helping each other, Lady Tan’s Circle of Women is a triumphant reimagining of the life of one person who was remarkable in the Ming dynasty and would be considered remarkable today.
The Mists of Avalon
The Mists of Avalon
The Stand
Stephen King · 2008
Anne of Green Gables
L. M. Montgomery
Brave New World
Aldous Huxley · 2020
Uglies
Scott Westerfeld · 2011
The Secret History
Donna Tartt · 2011
<b><b><b>A READ WITH JENNA BOOK CLUB PICK <b>• ONE OF <i>TIME MAGAZINE</i>'S 100 BEST MYSTERY AND THRILLER BOOKS OF ALL TIME • </b>INTERNATIONAL BESTSELLER • A contemporary literary classic and "a<b>n accomplished psychological thriller ... absolutely chilling" (<i>Village Voice</i>)</b>, f<b>rom the Pulitzer Prize–winning author of <i>The Goldfinch.<br><br></i></b></b></b>One of <i>The Atlantic</i>’s Great American Novels of the Past 100 Years</b><br><br>Under the influence of a charismatic classics professor, a group of clever, eccentric misfits at a New England college discover a way of thought and life a world away from their banal contemporaries. But their search for the transcendent leads them down a dangerous path, beyond human constructs of morality.<br><br><b>“A remarkably powerful novel [and] a ferociously well-paced entertainment . . . Forceful, cerebral, and impeccably controlled.” —<i>The New York Times</i></b>
Dracula
Bram Stoker · 1897
Circe
Madeline Miller · 2018
Jane Eyre
Charlotte Brontë
the night circus
Erin Morgenstern · 2011
the book thief
Markus Zusak · 2007
Hester: A Novel
Laurie Lico Albanese • 2022
Slaughterhouse-Five: A Novel (Modern Library 100 Best Novels)
Kurt Vonnegut · 1999
Slaughterhouse-Five is a satirical novel by Kurt Vonnegut about World War II experiences and journeys through time of a chaplain's assistant named Billy Pilgrim. It is generally recognized as Vonnegut's most influential and popular work. Vonnegut's use of the firebombing of Dresden as a central event makes the novel semi-autobiographical, because he was present then.
Speak
Laurie Halse Anderson · 2011
Freshman year at Merryweather High is not going well for Melinda Sordino. She busted an end-of-summer party by calling the cops, and now her friends—and even strangers—all hate her. So she stops trying, stops talking. She retreats into her head, and all the lies and hypocrisies of high school become magnified, leaving her with no desire to talk to anyone anyway. But it’s not so comfortable in her head, either—there’s something banging around in there that she doesn’t want to think about. She can’t just go on like this forever. Eventually, she’s going to have to confront the thing she’s avoiding, the thing that happened at the party, the thing that nobody but her knows. She’s going to have to speak the truth.
The Bell Jar (Modern Classics)
Sylvia Plath · 2005
<p><i>The Bell Jar</i> chronicles the crack-up of Esther Greenwood: brilliant, beautiful, enormously talented, and successful, but slowly going under -- maybe for the last time. Sylvia Plath masterfully draws the reader into Esther's breakdown with such intensity that Esther's insanity becomes completely real and even rational, as probable and accessible an experience as going to the movies. Such deep penetration into the dark and harrowing corners of the psyche is an extraordinary accomplishment and has made <i>The Bell Jar</i> a haunting American classic.</p> <p>This P.S. edition features an extra 16 pages of insights into the book, including author interviews, recommended reading, and more.</p>
The Virgin Suicides
Jeffrey Eugenides · 2011
First published in 1993, The Virgin Suicides announced the arrival of a major new American novelist. In a quiet suburb of Detroit, the five Lisbon sisters—beautiful, eccentric, and obsessively watched by the neighborhood boys—commit suicide one by one over the course of a single year. As the boys observe them from afar, transfixed, they piece together the mystery of the family’s fatal melancholy, in this hypnotic and unforgettable novel of adolescent love, disquiet, and death. Jeffrey Eugenides evokes the emotions of youth with haunting sensitivity and dark humor and creates a coming-of-age story unlike any of our time. Adapted into a critically acclaimed film by Sofia Coppola, The Virgin Suicides is a modern classic, a lyrical and timeless tale of sex and suicide that transforms and mythologizes suburban middle-American life.
Howl and Other Poems (City Lights Pocket Poets, No. 4)
Allen Ginsberg · 1959
The landmark, original publication of Allen Ginsberg’s HOWL & Other Poems!<br/>HOWL & Other Poems, the prophetic book that launched the Beat Generation, was published by Lawrence Ferlinghetti at City Lights Books in 1956. Considered the single most influential work of post-WWII United States poetry, the City Lights edition of HOWL has remained in print for more than 60 years, with well over 1,000,000 copies in print.<br/>A strident critique of middle-class complacency, consumerism, and capitalist militarism, HOWL also celebrates the pleasures and freedoms of the physical world, including a tribute to homosexual love. In addition to “Howl,” poems in the book include: “A Supermarket in California,” “Sunflower Sutra,” “America,” “In the Baggage Room at Greyhound,” “Transcription of Organ Music,” and “Wild Orphan,” among others.<br/>A History of HOWL:<br/>City Lights founder Lawrence Ferlinghetti first heard Allen Ginsberg read “Howl” at the Six Gallery event in San Francisco, 1955, which featured writers Philip Lamantia, Gary Snyder, Philip Whalen, and Michael McClure, introduced by poet Kenneth Rexroth. Jack Kerouac was present, but did not read, encouraging and cheering the other poets on. Ferlinghetti was so impressed by Ginsberg’s performance, he immediately telegrammed him, referencing Ralph Waldo Emerson’s response to Walt Whitman’s Leaves of Grass, “I greet you at the beginning of a great career. When do I get the manuscript?”<br/>When the first edition of HOWL arrived from its British printers, it was seized almost immediately by U.S. Customs, and shortly thereafter the San Francisco police arrested its publisher and editor, Lawrence Ferlinghetti, together with the City Lights Bookstore manager, Shigeyoshi Murao. The two were charged with disseminating obscene literature, and the case was sent to trial. Ferlinghetti partnered with the ACLU to launch a defense of HOWL, and a parade of distinguished literary and academic witnesses appeared in court to persuade the judge of its merits. In the end, famously conservative Judge Clayton Horn ruled that the poem was not obscene, but rather, as he stated emphatically, HOWL was a work of “redeeming social significance.”<br/>The landmark decision signaled a sea change in American culture, and the City Lights edition of HOWL became a vital cornerstone in the ongoing struggle for free expression and representation. It continues to attract generation after generation of readers.<br/>“It is the poet, Allen Ginsberg, who has gone, in his own body, through the horrifying experiences described from life in these pages.”—William Carlos Williams<br/>“Ginsberg is both tragic and dynamic, a lyrical genius . . . probably the single greatest influence on American poetical voice since Whitman.”—Bob Dylan<br/>“Not only did he give us love and poetry, he reminded us of our civic duty to use our voice.”—Patti Smith<br/>“Howl was Allen's metamorphosis from quiet, brilliant, burning bohemian scholar trapped by his flames and repressions to epic vocal bard.”—Michael McClure
Leaves Of Grass: 1855
Walt Whitman · 2018
This is a copy of the first self-published copy of Leaves of Grass, published on July 4, 1855 in Brooklyn, NY. 795 copies were printed, although only 200 copies were bound with the green cover.<br/>The author's name did not appear on the cover, although it does appear in the poem on page 31 in this edition.<br/>Walt Whitman continued to work on this masterwork until his death. Six more versions appeared during his lifetime, and after his death a “death-bed” version appeared.<br/>History buffs will know that the 1855 edition was printed six years before Abraham Lincoln became president. Later editions are important because of the poems Whitman wrote about the Civil War and Abraham Lincoln.<br/>This 1855 edition is a favorite of many poets because of the fresh energy in the presentation and language.<br/>This edition was gone over line by line to be sure the text is readable, and the line breaks closely represent Whitman's original intention. Also, the full 1855 introduction by Walt Whitman is included in this edition.<br/>period reviews<br/>"We find upon our table (and shall put into the fire) a thin octavo volume, handsomely printed and bound. We shall not aid in extending the sale of this intensely vulgar, nay, absolutely beastly book, by telling our readers where it may be purchased." - Frank Leslie, Illustrated Newspaper<br/>"In glancing rapidly over the 'Leaves of Grass' you are puzzled whether to set the author down as a madman or an opium eater; when you have studied them you recognize a poet of extraordinary vigor, nay even beauty of thought, beneath the most fantastic garments of diction." The New York Daily News<br/>"We had ceased, we imagined, to be surprised at anything that America could produce...but the last monstrous importation from Brooklyn, New York, has scattered our indifference to the winds...This portrait expresses all the features of the hard democrat, and none of the flexile delicacy of the civilized poet." London Critic<br/>"Walt is one of the most amazing, one of the most startling, one of the most perplexing creations of the modern American mind." Translatlantic Leader<br/>"We have glanced through this book with disgust and astonishment; - astonishment that anyone can be found who would dare to print such a farrago of rubbish." Dublin Review<br/>Other Whitman collections available from Cholla Needles on Amazon<br/>Leaves Of Grass: 1855<br/>Short Stories (1848)<br/>Three Novellas (1846)<br/>Drum Taps (1865)<br/>Goodbye My Fancy (1988-1991)
The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue
V. E. Schwab · 2023
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER<br/>USA TODAY BESTSELLER<br/>NATIONAL INDIE BESTSELLER<br/>THE WASHINGTON POST BESTSELLER<br/><br/>In the vein of The Time Traveler’s Wife and Life After Life, The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue is New York Times bestselling author V. E. Schwab’s genre-defying tour de force.<br/><br/>Recommended by Entertainment Weekly, Real Simple, NPR, Slate, and Oprah Magazine<br/>#1 Library Reads Pick―October 2020<br/>#1 Indie Next Pick―October 2020<br/>BOOK OF THE YEAR (2020) FINALIST―Book of The Month Club<br/><br/>A “Best Of” Book From: Oprah Mag * CNN * Amazon * Amazon Editors * NPR * Goodreads * Bustle * PopSugar * BuzzFeed * Barnes & Noble * Kirkus Reviews * Lambda Literary * Nerdette * The Nerd Daily * Polygon * Library Reads * io9 * Smart Bitches Trashy Books * LiteraryHub * Medium * BookBub * The Mary Sue * Chicago Tribune * NY Daily News * SyFy Wire * Powells.com * Bookish * Book Riot * Library Reads Voter Favorite *<br/><br/>A Life No One Will Remember. A Story You Will Never Forget.<br/><br/>France, 1714: in a moment of desperation, a young woman makes a Faustian bargain to live forever―and is cursed to be forgotten by everyone she meets.<br/><br/>Thus begins the extraordinary life of Addie LaRue, and a dazzling adventure that will play out across centuries and continents, across history and art, as a young woman learns how far she will go to leave her mark on the world.<br/><br/>But everything changes when, after nearly 300 years, Addie stumbles across a young man in a hidden bookstore and he remembers her name.<br/><br/>Also by V. E. Schwab<br/><br/>Shades of Magic<br/>A Darker Shade of Magic<br/>A Gathering of Shadows<br/>A Conjuring of Light<br/><br/>Villains<br/>Vicious<br/>Vengeful
Le Petit Prince
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry · 1943
OVER 140 MILLION COPIES SOLD<br/><br/>The beloved classic story about a young prince's travels through space—a profound tale about loneliness and loss, and love and friendship—in French.<br/><br/>A pilot crashes in the Sahara Desert and encounters a strange young boy who calls himself the Little Prince. The Little Prince has traveled there from his home on a lonely, distant asteroid with a single rose. The story that follows is a beautiful and at times heartbreaking meditation on human nature.<br/><br/>The Little Prince is one of the best-selling and most translated books of all time, universally cherished by children and adults alike. In this French edition, the artwork has been restored to match in detail and in color Saint-Exupéry's original artwork.
The Handmaid's Tale
Margaret Atwood · 1998
<b><b><b><b>#1 <i>NEW YORK TIMES</i> BESTSELLER </b>• An instant classic and eerily prescient cultural phenomenon, from “the patron saint of feminist dystopian fiction” (<i>The New York Times</i>) • The sixth and final season of the award-winning Hulu series starring Elisabeth Moss is now streaming</b><br><br>Look for <i>The Testaments</i>, the <b>bestselling, award-winning</b> sequel to <i>The Handmaid’s Tale<br></i></b></b><br>In Margaret Atwood’s dystopian future, environmental disasters and declining birthrates have led to a Second American Civil War. The result is the rise of the Republic of Gilead, a totalitarian regime that enforces rigid social roles and enslaves the few remaining fertile women. Offred is one of these, a Handmaid bound to produce children for one of Gilead’s commanders. Deprived of her husband, her child, her freedom, and even her own name, Offred clings to her memories and her will to survive. At once a scathing satire, an ominous warning, and a tour de force of narrative suspense, <i>The Handmaid’s Tale </i>is a modern classic.<br><br><b>Includes an introduction by Margaret Atwood</b>
Sunrise on the Reaping
Suzanne Collins · 2025
The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes
Suzanne Collins · 2020
Ambition will fuel him.Competition will drive him.But power has its price.<br/>It is the morning of the reaping that will kick off the tenth annual Hunger Games. In the Capitol, eighteen-year-old Coriolanus Snow is preparing for his one shot at glory as a mentor in the Games. The once-mighty house of Snow has fallen on hard times, its fate hanging on the slender chance that Coriolanus will be able to outcharm, outwit, and outmaneuver his fellow students to mentor the winning tribute. The odds are against him. He's been given the humiliating assignment of mentoring the female tribute from District 12, the lowest of the low. Their fates are now completely intertwined -- every choice Coriolanus makes could lead to favor or failure, triumph or ruin. Inside the arena, it will be a fight to the death. Outside the arena, Coriolanus starts to feel for his doomed tribute... and must weigh his need to follow the rules against his desire to survive no matter what it takes.
The Hunger Games Trilogy
Suzanne Collins · 2011
The stunning Hunger Games trilogy is complete! The extraordinary, ground breaking New York Times bestsellers The Hunger Games and Catching Fire, along with the third book in The Hunger Games trilogy by Suzanne Collins, Mockingjay, are available for the first time ever in e-book. Stunning, gripping, and powerful.
Animal Farm
George Orwell · 1996
1984
George Orwell · 1961
<b>Written more than 70 years ago, <i>1984</i> was George Orwell’s chilling prophecy about the future. And while 1984 has come and gone, his dystopian vision of a government that will do anything to control the narrative is timelier than ever...<br><br><b>• Nominated as one of America’s best-loved novels by PBS’s <i>The Great American Read •</i></b><br></b><br>“<i>The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.</i>”<br><br>Winston Smith toes the Party line, rewriting history to satisfy the demands of the Ministry of Truth. With each lie he writes, Winston grows to hate the Party that seeks power for its own sake and persecutes those who dare to commit thoughtcrimes. But as he starts to think for himself, Winston can’t escape the fact that Big Brother is always watching...<br><br>A startling and haunting novel, <i>1984</i> creates an imaginary world that is completely convincing from start to finish. No one can deny the novel’s hold on the imaginations of whole generations, or the power of its admonitions—a power that seems to grow, not lessen, with the passage of time.
The Outsiders
S. E. Hinton · 2006
The Perks of Being a Wallflower
Stephen Chbosky · 1999
Standing on the fringes of life offers a unique perspective. But there comes a time to see what it looks like from the dance floor. This haunting novel about the dilemma of passivity vs. passion marks the stunning debut of a provocative new voice in contemporary fiction: The Perks of Being a Wallflower.<br/><br/>This is the story of what it's like to grow up in high school. More intimate than a diary, Charlie's letters are singular and unique, hilarious and devastating. We may not know where he lives. We may not know to whom he is writing. All we know is the world he shares. Caught between trying to live his life and trying to run from it puts him on a strange course through uncharted territory. The world of first dates and mixed tapes, family dramas and new friends. The world of sex, drugs, and The Rocky Horror Picture Show, when all one requires is that perfect song on that perfect drive to feel infinite.<br/>Through Charlie, Stephen Chbosky has created a deeply affecting coming-of-age story, a powerful novel that will spirit you back to those wild and poignant roller coaster days known as growing up.
